Cartoon Energy Descent!

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Well, it had to happen at some point. It’s all been a little full-on recently. Work pressure, parenthood . . . taking their toll on the old blog.

Anyway, I have been turned into a cartoon by A2 Geography student, Max, as part of a homework task on energy security. Not sure about my bug-eyed cartoon alter-ego, but some excellent questions dealing with the theme of peak oil and climate change.

The 'Guy from Texas' looking happy with the oil industry . . . for now!

The ‘Guy from Texas’ looking happy with the oil industry . . . for now!

Interesting take on the ‘business as usual’ approach of big business, as represented by the ‘guy from Texas’!

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Here’s the overview!

Thanks for the flattering hair situation . . .

Thanks for the flattering hair situation . . .

And finally . . . the rise of Green Man to move us onto renewable energy resources. Resistance is futile.

Stories of Energy Descent Part 1

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It’s 2030 and Worthing has changed. Without cheap oil or other fossil fuels, we’ve had to find new ways of doing things. From how we heat our homes, to how we get around, or how we feed ourselves, Worthing in 2030 is very different to Worthing in 2011. In fact, Worthing is a thriving, vibrant community, but how have things changed? What will we do? What will we be nostalgic for?

AT the end of 2011, Transition Town Worthing ran a creative writing competition which asked budding local writers to think about what Worthing might be like in 2030. And, yes, how on Earth could Worthing turn into a thriving and vibrant community (I thought that might prove a tall order . . . )

Anyway, here is one of the final entries. See what you think.

‘From The Sea, Plenty’ by Ben Ellis 

Detective Gray: Beginning interview with Mr Joseph Mannings. The time is 11.15am on Saturday 21st September 2030. Present are myself, Detective Gray, and Sergeant Hickman. Mr Mannings has forfeited his right to legal representation. Mr Mannings, are you aware that you have access to legal aid?

Mannings: Yeah, I’m alright. Gray: OK, can you confirm you are Joseph Mannings of 34 Mordinges Drive?

Mannings: Yes, that’s correct.

Gray: And you’re a licensed taxi driver for ‘Sunlight Cabs’?

Mannings: Yep, for over 15 years. Now, if this is about the dodgy batteries I used to pass off at the solar battery stations, I’ve already paid that fine…

Gray: No, this is nothing to do with that. Anything else you want to confess before I put the first question to you?

Mannings: Undeclared earnings?

Gray: For the benefit of the tape, I’m showing Mr Mannings Exhibit A1, a photo of two gentlemen. Do you recognise either of these two men, Joe?

Mannings: No.

Gray: At least look at the photo Joe! Let me remind you, you’re not under caution, you have not been charged and you’re not a suspect. We need your help Joe, it could be vitally important for the whole town.

Mannings: No, they don’t ring a bell, what more can I tell you?

Gray: I’m showing Mr Mannings exhibit A2, this is a CCTV still of the same two gentlemen walking out of the Maglev terminal at Worthing Station yesterday evening at 6.23pm, heading towards the taxi rank.

Mannings: OK, OK, now I’ve got them pegged. That one bloke with the orange suitcase, I remember now. What bloke walks around with a bright orange suitcase, you know what I mean?

Gray: Slowly, Joe, talk us through the journey with them.

Mannings: Well, I tried to help him put the suitcase in the boot but he insisted on doing it himself, whatever, I ain’t going to make a point of lifting a heavy case. He doesn’t say anything though, it’s all the other guy. Both of them look Middle Eastern but the guy doing the talking sounds like a Brummie and he translates everything to the other guy. I’m no language expert but I’m guessing it’s Arabic.

Gray: Where did they want to go?

Mannings: The seafront, which is a little strange because visitors usually want to go straight to their hotel. Anyway, the traffic’s a nightmare because of the World Kite Surfing Championships this weekend and some kids decided to kite-skateboard through town causing mayhem. The foreign bloke, the Arab, is examining the inside of the car, leaning forward trying to see how I’m driving it. I ask the Brum, ‘What’s he looking for?’, he says it’s the first time he’s been in an electro car, they still have petrol ones where he’s from. There’s more chatter and then the Brum says the other guy wants to see me change a battery at a solar station. So we go; I point out the big solar panelled roof, remove the battery and swap it for a fully charged one, pay and then off we go again. I take them to Worthing Marina, park up and they offer me more money for a little tour and a few questions.

Gray: What did they want to see and what did they ask?

Mannings: They were interested in the Worthing Wind & Wave Turbine Array out in the bay. I told them there were tours to the array from the marina and I could get cheap tickets from my mate Bazza for a private tour so I gave them his number. Bazza uses his staff discount, it’s nothing dodgy.

Gray: And then what?

Mannings: The Arab gets his phone out and takes photos whilst the Brummie asks about stats and all that malarkey. I’ve got no idea about the specifics, all I know is that Worthing is selfsufficient. The Brummie translates a question, something like, is Worthing the only town like this? I said not for long because foreigners are here all the time seeing how things are done. The Arab ain’t happy and wants to leave.

Gray: Where do you go?

Mannings: They’ve got rooms booked at ‘The New Beach Hotel’. The Arab babbles away on his phone all the way there. Obviously I don’t know what about but he weren’t happy, I can tell you that.

Hickman: Why was your in-car CCTV switched off?

Mannings: I wondered when you were going to pipe up. Busted innit. The taxi company ain’t paying to fix it and I can’t afford nothing until after the New Year.

Gray: Sergeant Hickman is from the Anti-Terrorism Squad. You got any reason to believe these men were engaged in any reconnaissance?

Mannings: Casing the joint? They took photos but then visitors do that all the time. Why would they want to blow up anything round here? They got a severe dislike of Lawn Bowls or something?

Hickman: Like you said, this town is fully energy self-sufficient which has got the Chinese, the Indians and others interested which is upsetting the apple cart. What was in the suitcase?

Mannings: I’m an honest cabbie officer plus it had a bloody great lock on it.

Gray: *** SOUND OF DOOR OPENING *** For the benefit of the tape PC Bragg has just entered the interview room.

Bragg: Sir, they’re not at ‘The New Beach Hotel’, they left early this morning.

Hickman: Damn! Gray, get everyone on this we need to know what’s in that case.

Bragg: Also, a body was found at the marina today. He’s been formally identified as Barry Jacobs.

Mannings: That’s Bazza!

Hickman: It’s kicking off! *** CLASSIFIED ***

Bragg: One other thing, sir, maybe connected. An hotel have phoned in a complaint about a kite surfing team leaving without paying and get this, they left an overturned barrel of oil in the room, it’s made a right mess.

Hickman: They’re going to head for the array!

Gray: Interview terminated at 11:34am.

It’s life Jim, but not as we know it

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Inspired by a couple of poems in the Totnes EDAP book, and the work of Matt Harvey, I put on my bard’s hat one afternoon when I should have been working . . . Transition Town Worthing have since done a live performance of it, complete with shakers and a musical saw. Oh dear!

It’s life Jim, but not as we know it.

Please select an option:

Lots of time,

Or GM wine?

Adults on skateboards,

Or Dr No vocal chords?

Organic peas,

Or electric SUVs?

Transition chic,

Or another giant Gulf of Mexico oil leak?

Nature-loving kids,

Or online bids?

Productive foody back gard-ons,

Or more stuff to spend credit card ons?

Embracing energy powerdown,

Or burning coal to make the sky turn brown?

Cycling to do a useful job,

Or rioting over petrol prices with an angry mob?

Learning new skills for future needs,

Or buying a packet of biotech corporation hybrid seeds?

Playing ukulele to keep amused,

Or watching your 60-inch plasma screen till your life is
used (up)?

Utopia,

Or dystopia,

Or Worthing Pier?

Drinking a pint of local beer,

Or a processed meal that makes you feel a bit queer?

Making the most of your one wild and precious life,

Or feeding your addiction to oil for the remainder of
your life?

Helping create a vibrant town,

Or complaining about cycles and wind turbines and
dragging me down?

Living a fruitful existence without too much fossil
carbon,

Or digging a fall-out shelter in my back garden?

Seeing the A27 transformed into a dual cabbageway,

Or keeping quiet when they take another allotment away?

Whatever options we take,

Whatever way we go,

It’s life Jim,

But
not as we know
. It.

Steve Last, June 2010.

TTW has started a Transition Tales Group to foster stories, poems, spoof adverts of the future, agony aunt columns, and a story writing competition. I’d really like the EDAP to include as much of this element as possible to keep it firmly based within the community and to avoid it becoming a dry, boring document that no-one wants to read. Deciding what stays and what goes is another matter . . .

Cartoon by Spencer Hill